Sajak Tentang

kenapa sebaiknya jauh jauh

Karena dekat mengundang resah.

Dia, berbeda
Dari dia-dia yang lain, versiku
sebelumnya

Dia ada tanpa membawa makna
Tapi cukup menghujam tanya

Dia sungguh berbeda
Bermuka dua
Yang satu sungguh sederhana
Sisanya, sisanya
Mana tahu aku yang mana tipu daya

Jadi sebaiknya,
Jauh saja

lessons

you now, third semester of college, more spare times = more things u shudn't remember-but you think about it anyway. kinda settle here for some reason, living faraway from home has given me strength to stand on my own. it also makes me realize that besides of all, family comes first.

nah, maybe that was one thing i barely stand for back then. couple years ago i made a lot of wrong choices just because i feel like i am the center of the world- huff. i mean, i was young spirit ready to make my own decision (in fact there are stuffs i regret by now ._.). but the reality: i thought i was in my comfort zone, whatever i did wrong, my parents will always taking care of me, feed me, etc etc.

i found art and music are my muse so i spent my time busy in the street attending or creating so called gigs or exhibition everywhere (which i still doing this maybe forever) but the problem was less family time. i heard but aint listened what my parents said. there were time i arguing a lot with mom, first world mother-teenage daughter problem sih. but still regretting it because nowadays, just to hear a voice from 'em i should make a call in good timing :( and it cost $$$.

in love life i already did make wrong choices (it is like my thing up until now -_____-) i did like the so called bad ass, got broken heart, in love secretly from distance, friendzoned (and friendzone-ing, ups) also had a complicated long time relationship which yeaah.. it started i had crush with his friend but ended up with him but it was all over. ohh life... girls life.... always have their own interesting stories, isn't it?

so we're get to the wise part.
people make mistakes. it makes us human. it is our job to get the lessons for that and make no same mistake in the other time. maybe it hurts, painful, full of disappointment, but it will get funnier if you re-think about it :)


anywaayyy, my old man finally give up his smoking habit! it started from 6/5months a go but i just knew it earlier in this year (distance, always). am a proud daughter! love you, pa! just wish both of my dad and mum and my beloved sissy always good in health and luck and happiness. and and and aaam just happy so i think the world have to know ha ha haaaaaa
 

alhamdulillah :)



xoxo!

nightmare

sini, duduk sebentar. aku akan menulis sebuah cerita.
waktu itu kejadian lupa awalnya dari mana, berakhir saat awal 4sd kira-kira. ica (adikku, satu-satunya) semakin tumbuh lucu-lucunya, kami berjarak 4,5th. she's so effing adorable. kami berdua diasuh oleh seorang wanita yang sama, mbak ni. mbak ni sudah berada di rumah kami saat aku masih bayi, dari masih serumah dengan bapak+ibu (kakek nenek dari papa), hingga akhirnya pindah. mama papa full kerja hingga sore demi masa depan keluarga ini, jadinya selama setengah hari mbak ni lah yang menjaga kami.

entah kenapa semakin ica tumbuh besar, semakin sayang dia dengannya. seperti punya mainan baru, hari-kehari sibuk lah dia ke adik ku satu-satunya itu. aku yang waktu itu berada di sekolah dasar sudah tidak menarik perhatiannya lagi. setiap antar-jemput ku waktu itu mengantarkan ku kembali ke rumah, horor rasanya. aku samar-samar ingat bagaimana masa-masa itu. selama seberapa waktu itu aku tidak makan siang di rumah, karena tak ada makan siang untuk ku. setelah melepas seragam otomatis langsung ke sebelah, rumah mba indri, tetanggaku, teman baikku hingga sekarang. aku masih tidak habis pikir hingga sekarang. setega itu ya, mbak ni? atau aku pernah melakukan hal se salah itu?

sisanya aku ingat betul berapa kali aku ke rumah mba indri dengan keadaan menangis. i was so young that time. and my sissy was younger. pernah ada masa ku benci ica gara-gara hal ini. yang akhirnya semua berhenti setelah aku bicara keras-keras ke papa kalau aku benci ica. dan terbuka lah semua akar permasalahan yang ada. gara-gara itu mama papa menjelaskan betapa sayangnya ica terhadapku, begitu pula mereka. kami ini cuman berdua, semua sama rata. sejak hari itu aku tidak tahu (dan tidak peduli) dimana mbak ni berada. wherever you are, i forgive you.

but i dont know if my childhood has already forgive you or not. its just.. recently i had nightmare about this. and there are things crossing my mind. why? do you feel any regret about what you did to me?

recap part I

halo, blog.
beberapa hari belakangan kambuh lagi kebiasaan tidak tidur hingga fajar ku ini. semoga kuat melawan sakit hingga akhir ujian nanti huhuhuuuuuu. apakah gara-gara patah sebelum jatuh terlalu dalam yaa? hahahaha another hurty story that might be laugh-able for years later....
ah sudahlah mari mulai bercerita!

there are many things that haven't been posted here yet, kinda feel like am gonna make press release of my activities here. this year so glad that i did a bunch of things that i uber like:

i volunteered as Fashion Fitter at UI Fashion Week 2012

effing happy to be the part of first fashion events that presented by my university hihi. held at the brand new Kuningan City. being fashion fitter is one of my personal dream, and yes, got plenty memorable times there. i met amazing people that has fashion as their passion and live with it. designers, talents, even other committees. i see no poser there, it's true if someone says when you're in fashion world, people with ideas, and people with willingness to pay to be seen as hip as they want is clearly different. you are gonna be fully appreciated by your creation. ooh i hope that someday i'll be one of them :") naah when i fitted Alex[a]lexa, i met their internee and ended be friends with them, they're Lingga und Dayi. the designer is mba Monik, they're really humble and nice! they got fresh and unique design with mostly colorful floral pattern. i would definitely wear them! (if only i could afford it, huff) the other line that i fitted is de.cada.dia, own by a young and talented UI student, kak Bethanny. her designs are very classy and well made by a super comfy fabric. they got edgy clothes there, and trust me there will be no other brand that lookalike. one of my college mates is also the talent here. she's so pretty and professional! i hope you're doin good at modelling, Ivy!

alex[a]lexa team

 alexalexa (1)

  alexalexa (2)

 de.cada.dia

 

makeup room

aanddd its time for a little narcissistic....

me with kak Bethanny (de.cada.dia), Barly Asmara, mba Monik (alexalexa)

 the Fashion Fitter Team! 

thanks rhea, farzen, depoy, atika, and other fitter folks who gave me this opportunity. so sad that i didn't apply for UI Fashion Week 2013 this June huhu it's because all college matters and other committees keep my time and am afraid if too much activities will drives me crazy and irresponsible.. so goodluck for the next UIFW!

ini salah satu hal di tahun ini yang harus banget direkam di salah satu postingan di blog ini, walaupun udah kemaren banget :P

next, i will post more about events or gigs that i attended this year. recap for 2012. i am more than ready to face 2013.





xoxo!